Breakthrough Communicator Tip # 6: Model and Expect the Behavior You Want in Return
The building blocks for developing deep, secure personal and professional relationships are committing to conversation, using intention and expectation, and seeing the child in charge. In order to help in these three areas we find the iris and make eye contact to build instant rapport and use their name to grab and hold attention.
But what next?
How to we proceed?
This is an important moment for Breakthrough Communicators. When we determine if our other is right for us. Is this the type of person I want to build a deeper, more secure relationship with?
And it doesn't have to be everyone. We have ideal clients for a reason. We surround ourselves with individuals who bring out the best in us for a reason. It does not, should not, and cannot be everyone.
So how do we determine who fits?
Do You Have Ten Minutes to Try Something New?
Progress, not perfection, should be the goal of any innovative business leader. The mistakes that come from putting ourselves out there and trying something new ultimately lead to advancement and success.
So here's my challenge to you:
It’s no secret I would dearly love everyone in my circle to use video as a sharing device for their thoughts and ideas. And we make all sorts of excuses not to. Time, resources, money--although I guarantee in the time it takes you to write a 300-word blog, you could create an awesome video using the camera on your phone and you would still have content for your awesome blog.
Persuading Crowds Part 4: A Crowd of Many
Being Present: Looks different because with a crowd of one you want your audience to dominate the conversation. Talk less, listen more. With a crowd of many, this really isn't feasible unless you have two hours of material and eight hours of time. Conversation slows the tempo and pacing of a presentation which is why it is so important, when developing a speaking event, to plan out the timing of audience participation.
Persuading Crowds Part 3: A Crowd of One
Be Present: Dale Carnegie was a master at this. If you haven't read it, 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' absolutely has to be the next book on your reading list.
If you want to persuade you have to be interested and engaged in the other person. Talk less, listen more, ask questions, basically shut up and get out of your own way.
To use a great theatre term, 'live in the moment' with your other. There cannot be anything more important than the conversation you have in the moment. Your other is the most interesting human being in the world. That's the role you play in 1-2-1 crowd persuasion.
Persuading Crowds Part 2: A Crowd of Self
The Crowd of Self
This is the crowd that shuts us down again and again before we even have the opportunity to persuade others. This crowd has been growing inside of us for decades and reminds us constantly of perceived failures, humiliation, shame, regret, harsh criticism all in an effort to emphasize we are not enough. Not smart enough. Not talented enough. Not attractive enough. Not--insert your own limiting belief here--enough.