Hold Anyone's Attention: Breakthrough Communicators' Tip #6
Breakthrough Communicators build instant rapport with real decision makers, or the child in charge, by focusing intention and expectation through direct eye contact. And to master these skills, they practice every day.
But how do Breakthrough Communicators grab and hold the attention of these decision-makers?
There is no faster, and more positive way to immediately secure the attention of another than to…
What's Your Process/Trust Your Process: Part 2, Trust Your Process!
I was going to get a “D” on my final exam.
I was embarrassed, near tears, and in my defeat discovered something remarkable.
The freedom of letting go.
Every student was given a second chance. Three more arrows. I knew I couldn't do worse than seven, so I gave up overthinking and just trusted my muscle memory.
What's Your Process/Trust Your Process: Part 1, What's Your Process?
Growing up, I loved everything about baseball. I love the game, I love the stats, I love the rhythm and pacing. It's beautiful.
Also, as a tall, lanky kid I was appropriately built to be a pitcher.
And I remember, when I was young, throwing the baseball to my dad in our front driveway.
"Don't aim," he would yell. Which didn't make any sense to me. How do I throw accurately if I don't aim?
What I realized as I grew and matured as a pitcher and player is skills like accuracy and velocity don't come from willing or forcing a baseball to do what you want it to do. They come from process. Mechanics, release point, and muscle memory guarantees the ability to successfully throw a baseball where you want it to go time and time again.
Breakthrough Communicators: How to establish an instant connection
It does not matter the format. Whether it is in person, on video, or over the phone, Breakthrough Communicators make eye contact.
So what does that look like?
In-Person: Make eye contact at least 70% of the time. This benefits both parties.
Ever heard the saying, "the shortest distance between two points is a straight line"?
The shortest distance between you and the child in charge is eye contact.
The energy of your intention and expectation flows directly to your intended target.
Furthermore, when you are making eye contact with your other, they are making eye contact with you. Which means they are more likely to hear and receive the information you are sharing, and you’re building greater know, like, and trust and stronger personal and professional relationships.
Breakthrough Communicators: How to speak directly to the decision maker
Today we see our relationships for who they really are.
Did you ever read Matilda by Roald Dahl? If not, here's a one-sentence summary: a young girl develops magical powers in response to the abuse, trauma and mistreatment she experiences at the hands of her family, peers, and a tyrannical headmistress.
It's a wonderful story which beautifully captures the self-defense mechanisms we create in response to the hurt, trauma, and abuse we experience in our early lives.
As human beings we have core needs which must be met. Love, security, community. And as children we take these core needs for granted. We assume, even expect, food, clothing, shelter, love, companionship, play.
Then something happens which disrupts the expectation of our basic needs. A meal is skipped. Betrayal by a friend. Physical abuse in the home. And out of our survivalist mindset comes that first layer of protection.